Dating an Independent Woman Respectfully: 6 Pointers

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Dating an independent woman may be challenging for someone who hasn’t done it before. However, it can also be one of the easiest, most rewarding relationships you’ll ever have. 

Independent women are strong, successful, and fun to be around. They’re usually self-sufficient too which means that if you’re dating one, they may have high expectations.

So what are the boundaries to be aware of when you’re dating an independent woman? And how can you impress someone who is always one step ahead?

Here are six pointers on how to respectfully date an independent woman. 

Our Guide on Dating an Independent Woman

Don’t completely give up on chivalry 

Chivalrous gestures still count, so don’t refrain from doing them. 

Just because you’ve offered up your jacket or held open a door doesn’t mean she’s no longer independent. It just shows her that you’ve good manners.

It’s always good to be courteous and polite, no matter who you’re dating.

If you’re worried that she isn’t comfortable with a gesture of yours, then ask her about it. Open communication is key to a happy relationship.

Just don’t get bent out of shape if she says she’s not a fan of your chivalrous behavior. It’s not something to take personally. 

An independent woman isn’t afraid to speak her mind!

She’s probably not interested in playing games 

Dating an independent woman means that she won’t be dependent on her partner. She doesn’t look to a relationship for validation. This means she’s usually uninterested in playing games or chasing a crush.

Above everything else, she’s looking for a supportive companion who she can trust, a relationship where the responsibility is split 50/50.

So if you’re generally unfaithful in relationships or you like to toy with your partner’s emotions, you two might not be compatible

Don’t insist you can do something “better” than her

If you’re dating an independent woman, leave any sort of mansplaining at the door. 

There’s no need to tell a woman how to do something just because you are capable of doing it too, particularly if she never asked you for advice.

For example, if she’s fixing the sink after a leak, don’t tell her about an alternative or better method that you use. Instead, ask her if she needs any help and respect her response if it happens to be no. 

She doesn’t need a man to complete her jobs or life, so making her feel like she does won’t go down too well. 

Try not to be too intimidated 

If you’re dating an independent woman, you might feel as if you’re not offering much in the relationship. But you are. You’re giving her your companionship and support. 

She can handle the world on her own, but she’s looking for someone to make that experience even more memorable. That’s where you come in. 

Sure, in the past a man’s contribution to a relationship may have been purely financial but today, a modern man supports his partner holistically. 

If you’re secure in yourself then it shouldn’t matter if your partner doesn’t rely on you for everything. What matters is that they’re choosing you to share their life with. 

Remember, a woman’s independence isn’t a threat to a man’s masculinity. 

Avoid using the phrase “for a woman” 

When you’re dating an independent woman, steer clear of using any belittling language. 

For example, avoid saying something like “For a woman, you sure know a lot about cars!” or, “It’s impressive that a woman like you takes out the trash cans every week.” 

Women are just as capable as men. When you categorize their victories like this, you make their wins seem less impressive. This can be pretty insensitive. Making her feel less than will probably be a relationship red flag for her.

Acknowledge her accomplishments for what they are. You don’t need to reference her gender. So instead, say something like “You’re a fantastic driver” or “Taking out the trash cans every week shows real dedication.”

Don’t make her independence a talking point 

Not all women want or expect to be taken care of by a man. But what she probably does expect from her partner is respect for her lifestyle choices.

A woman embracing her independence may be new to you but it’s the norm to her, so don’t treat it like a personality quirk. Drawing attention to her independent lifestyle like this may seem disrespectful and make her feel like a spectacle. 

Dating an independent woman can lead to a fulfilling and balanced relationship. 

Being in a successful relationship doesn’t mean that you, as the man, should always come out on top, it means being on the same team as your partner. 

So start working with your independent crush instead of against her. That way you two will be unbeatable. 

Karen Belz

About the author: Karen Belz

Karen Belz has written for sites like Bustle, PreviouslyTV, Heavy, and HelloGiggles. She's also the founder of Best Recap Ever, a site that's focused on television news and reviews. She's a fan of sketch comedy shows and most movies that involve Muppets, and has been addicted to Sugar Free Red Bull since 2005.

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